7 Tips for Expectant Grandmothers and Grandfathers

Once your own children have left the nest, you can first catch up on a good dose of freedom: spontaneous trips, not having to be at home exactly on time, visiting loved ones – all of this is now possible. But at the same time, you also notice that you miss your children and a bit of the hustle and bustle at home. The joy is all the greater when you hear the news: “You’re going to be grandparents!” Now begins an exciting and thrilling time. To help you fully embrace your role as a grandparent and be a wonderful support to your family, while still preserving your freedom, five-time grandfather Jürgen Busch from the blog has put together some tips for your new role as grandma or grandpa.

1. When grandparents promote family cohesion

With the birth of the grandchild, the family grows by one more little member. In your role as grandmother or grandfather, you are an important point of reference for your granddaughter/grandson, so that shared time should not be too short. Unless the fortunate circumstance exists that you all live together in a multi-generational house, there is – unlike with your own children when they were small – always a certain physical distance. To still stay informed about each other's daily lives and to be able to stick together as a family, it makes sense to regular joint activities to plan. A family appointment calendar is especially useful for this. This way, everyone can see who has time when, and it is very easy to arrange visits or Excursions plans. Also a Family vacation once or twice a year promotes family cohesion. It is important that you as a Grandma or Oops Active part in family life and avoid situations where one involved party feels like a guest with the other.

2. Portion advice well

As so often in life, the same applies to grandparents: too much is unhealthy! Better to try yourself in the Observer role and don't try to interfere in every situation as long as there is no danger – sometimes that requires a lot of calm and patience. Feel free to remind yourself again and again: no one is perfect from the start, neither in motherhood nor in Father role still in the grandparent role. Don't criticize your child if, for example, they take a different approach to parenting than you are used to. Instead, offer advice when asked. Unsolicited know-it-all attitudes can drive many away. Avoid saying "You must ..." and instead share your experiences — the conclusions are then left to the parents.

3. Talk about education

The parenting style of today can no longer be compared to that of yesterday. Talk with your children and grandchildren about upbringing and find out what is desired and what is not welcome. Many grandchildren enjoy the fact that grandparents often turn a blind eye and, for example, there are tasty treats here and there, but this is sometimes not appreciated by the parents – surely you will find a healthy middle ground between spoiling and being consistent. It can help if you also remember your own childhood and honestly ask yourself: what was perhaps less good in your own upbringing and treatment by your parents and grandparents, and can it now be changed with the grandchildren? Even if some parenting methods may seem unfamiliar to you at first glance – give it a chance and trust your child that they only want the best for your granddaughter/grandson.

4. Get involved yourself

Was grandpa in his own paternal role was only the provider in the family? Then it's high time to lend a hand! It's never too late to learn everything about the and the of the grandchild. Of course, this becomes somewhat easier the closer the physical distance to the children. This way, grandpa (also in cooperation with grandma) enables the young parents to have some free space where they can enjoy time for themselves despite parenthood – and their support will certainly be especially appreciated. For many parents, it is initially not easy to leave the with the grandparents. Show your child that it can trust you and that you enjoy the time with your grandchild. After all, your grandchild also appreciates the closeness to you, which strengthens your bond. There is no specific time when your grandchild is allowed to stay with you. Work together with the parents to see how the little explorer feels and what is a good amount of time for you as well.

5. Don't forget your own happiness

As much as you cherish the time with your Grandchild also enjoy, You should not sacrifice all your free time and put your own interests aside – after all, you have earned the freedom you have gained. Because once the children are older, they will not feel comfortable if they are always the reason why grandma and grandpa cannot do this or that. A healthy balance between new responsibilities and previous freedom is important. You definitely have the right to say: "That’s fun for me now!"

6. Using new media

Not only has there been a lot of change in parenting style, but also in the Dealing with technology . Stay up to date with digital media – this way, you can participate much more actively in the lives of your children and grandchildren. One Video call here and small WhatsApp messages there, the time until the next meeting is shortened and they keep you updated on the development of the grandchildren. They will probably be happy to show you how the applications work. Maybe you also feel like taking a course that specifically explains digital media to older people. You can find such offers, for example, at the adult education center.

7. Support the grandchildren financially

Even with a narrow pension, it is possible to provide for the future of grandchildren. A savings account that only five euros per month that is paid in, after 18 years also amounts to over 1,000 euros, not including any interest earned. If you invest the money wisely and it accrues interest accordingly, the amount increases accordingly. A nice contribution towards a driver's license or a small financial boost for the first own apartment! And it doesn't always have to be big money gifts for birthdays or other occasions. Many grandchildren – and also the parents – enjoy spending time together and going on nice outings. Ideas for what you can give your granddaughter/ grandson can be found in the article „ The first birthday ".

Just as you previously adapted to the role of mother or father, it will also be the case as grandma or grandpa. Communicate openly with the parents about your uncertainties or possible questions, so that you can find a solution together. The most important thing is that you enjoy the time with your grandchild and experience many adventures together!

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