Mindfulness for Parents and Children

Once you have a baby, completely new questions will arise in your life, and suddenly you'll be thinking about topics you never would have considered before. It's a wonderful, exciting time, but we also understand if your head starts to spin at some point!

At LILLYDOO, we believe that you will surely make the right decisions for yourself and your little explorer. But also that it doesn't hurt to occasionally seek advice from people who deal with these questions daily and are experts in their field. That's why, in this series of articles, we want to ask experts the questions about pregnancy, birth, and parenthood that all of us have on our minds.

Laura Malina Seiler podcasts books

What exactly is mindfulness?

Dear Laura, what does mindfulness mean to you?

Mindfulness means for me being consciously present in the current moment and not identifying with my thoughts. When I am mindful, I am fully present in the here and now and not somewhere else in my mind. It also means being aware of one's own feelings and being able to regulate oneself in a positive way. When we are truly mindful, we are relaxed in a very pleasant way because we focus on what is happening right now and not on what might come tomorrow or what happened yesterday.

Can you learn mindfulness?

Definitely and fortunately! Mindfulness can be consciously trained and learned, for example with a regular meditation practice.

Mindfulness for children and families

Why is mindfulness important even for young children?

For children, it is especially important that parents learn to be mindful and present with them. In my opinion, this is one of the most important qualities we can have as parents. Children observe everything about us, and if they see that we are mindful of ourselves and our needs, but also of our environment and our fellow human beings, then they will do the same.

Are there fixed rules for mindfulness in the family or a "framework" to guide you?

Yes, definitely, although I think each family is best suited to decide for themselves how they want to practice mindfulness concretely. For example, as a family, we have rules to really listen when someone is speaking, not to interrupt, and not to have phones in hand during meals. Additionally, we always do a small gratitude circle together in the evening, where each person shares what they are most grateful for.

What can we adults learn from our children when it comes to mindfulness?

So much! Children are naturally mindful because they are always present in the moment anyway. We can learn from them to let go of negative emotions quickly and not hold on to them for long. We can learn from them to play consciously and not get distracted. We can learn from them to enjoy simple things again, have fun with life, and jump in puddles when it rains. Children are our greatest teachers, reminding us of everything that is truly important.

Do you have small tips or specific exercises for more mindfulness that families can incorporate into everyday life?

Yes, for example, establishing a gratitude routine with the children is wonderful: simply taking a moment in the evening before going to sleep to go through everything that was beautiful today.

How can parents create space in everyday family life to, for example, meditate or do yoga?

Best with the children. I do 10 minutes of yoga with my son every evening, and afterwards he snuggles into my lap while I meditate. Children love to try things out with us. We have a book with yoga exercises for children. My son always chooses the ones he wants to do. If you prefer to practice yoga as a balance for yourself alone, with small children there is usually only the option to do so when they are sleeping.

Meditation with children

Is meditation something that can already be "learned" or practiced with children from an early age?

Yes, absolutely. There are such beautiful children's meditations, and I believe that in the future, it will be one of the most important skills for our children to find their inner peace and to get to know themselves better through meditation.

Many parents occasionally feel overwhelmed, as if everything is getting on top of them. Do you have any specific tips at the end to help find inner peace again in such situations?

In acute moments of overwhelm, it is best to start with the breath and bring yourself back to the present moment. Take deep breaths and feel your feet on the ground. Afterwards, it helps to ask yourself good and resource-oriented (that is, focusing on what is already available) questions, such as "What do I need right now?", "Who can support me at the moment?" or "Which of my skills can help me now?"

Furthermore, I recommend starting the morning with a short meditation to recharge and connect with yourself. It makes a huge difference in my daily life whether it's a day I have meditated in the morning or not.

Thank you very much, dear Laura, for these helpful tips on mindfulness in everyday family life! At LILLYDOO, we know that family life can often be quite hectic and not everything can be carried out in complete calm. That is perfectly okay. But small moments of calm can make such a difference, and we hope that Laura's tips have inspired you to create these moments more often for yourself and your family. We wish you lots of joy in doing so!

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