The arrival of a baby brings huge changes on every level. And what a change! Your priorities are likely to shift, your responsibilities will multiply, and above all, you’ll notice that time takes on a whole new dimension. Day-to-day life with a baby is wonderful, but also exhausting.

Keeping this in mind during pregnancy is essential for lowering expectations and facing motherhood head-on, grounded in reality. In the following article, we share the things that change after the birth of a baby—things that aren’t always talked about. Ready? Let’s go!

1) Time does not exist

If there’s one thing motherhood teaches you, it’s that your sense of time changes completely. Zap! From the moment you hold your little explorer for the first time, time transforms: it’s no longer just yours. Now there’s a little person who depends on you and needs care, love, and nourishment. Day-to-day life with a baby is quite an adventure! A space adventure. In fact, during the first days, you may feel like you’ve entered a kind of black hole where there is no day or night. It can be disconcerting at first, and a little exhausting, but it’s completely normal. Gradually, you’ll be able to adjust to your baby’s needs and your own.

2) Sleeping is a privilege

During pregnancy, you were probably advised to take advantage of the time to sleep before the baby is born and that, afterwards, once the baby is here, you should sleep when the baby rests. Both suggestions are very wise because daily life with a baby can also mean feeling very sleepy . It’s true that it doesn’t happen in all cases, but typically babies wake up several times during the night seeking food and contact. This is completely normal. Babies still can’t differentiate between day and night, so their sleep is anarchic and brief . It’s estimated that, during the first year of their child’s life, parents lose about six weeks of sleep. Who would have
thought that sleeping would become a true privilege?

3) You can't do it alone, but with help you can

The first months with your baby can be intense if you don’t have a support network to lean on. Today, most people live in cities, far from family and with little time available. When a baby arrives, this absence becomes especially noticeable because everything can feel like doubt and exhaustion. Am I doing it right? Why are they crying? Is it normal for them to wake up so often? Don’t hesitate to ask for help whenever you need it. Sometimes a simple phone call to your mother or a friend is enough to ease the discomfort that can arise in day-to-day life with a baby. If you feel lonely, you can also turn to parenting groups . These are groups of families who meet to resolve doubts and share experiences. Online, you can find the group near your home that best suits your needs.

4 ) Creating routines will save you

Babies and young children need a routine because it helps them feel safe and secure. In fact, adults also need routines: they help us rest more and better, eat healthily, and take care of our mental health… Establishing routines at home will help you better synchronize your new life as a family. That said, it’s not advisable to be rigid or inflexible because then you’ll get exactly the opposite: more stress and worry. If the routine is broken one day, be compassionate with yourself and accept that it’s okay. Tomorrow will be another day!

5) Breastfeeding is a skill that is learned

Breastfeeding is not instinctive; it’s learned. Keeping this in mind during pregnancy is an important step, as it allows you to get informed and prepare before your little adventurer arrives. Up to five or six decades ago, breastfeeding was a learning passed down from mothers to daughters. Unfortunately, this tradition no longer exists, so it’s common for women to encounter difficulties when breastfeeding.

The feeling of insufficient milk, nipple pain, and mastitis are among the most common problems for mothers. Who should you turn to when breastfeeding isn’t going well? There are many options. Your midwife or pediatrician can help you if they have training in breastfeeding. From LactApp , the application dedicated to resolving questions about breastfeeding
and motherhood, they recommend attending a breastfeeding group . The consulting services of Certified Breastfeeding (IBCLC) professionals can also help you resolve all kinds of problems and questions. Many even travel to your home. And, of course, remember that if you have a partner, their support and accompaniment is essential.

6) The couple must reinvent themselves

Day-to-day life with a baby can also turn a couple’s world upside down. You have to divide your time and responsibilities, and adjusting to this isn’t always as easy as it seems. As your little adventurer grows, you’ll notice that the rhythm changes too, but essentially, the couple will have changed forever. Communication is always the foundation of a healthy relationship, but it needs to be strengthened when you become mothers and fathers. Now you’re facing a great challenge that can become more complicated over time.
Childhood and adolescence are long and intense, and involve many changes, but with love and respect, it will be easier to face this great project.

Remember: there are no manuals for raising and educating children—only common sense. Something similar happens in a relationship: there are no maps to guide you, but there are small clues you’ll discover along the way. These clues are different for every father and every mother, but you’ll find them as you go.

7) Allow yourself to make mistakes

Before becoming mothers, we often have a preconceived idea of what motherhood is.
Cinema, literature, and advertising have created a cultural image of what a mother should be: loving, accommodating, dedicated, beautiful. Perfect? When it’s your turn, you realize that perfection does not exist and that the romanticized image you had in your mind is far from reality.

So, how do you get past it? How do you stop feeling bad when your expectations don’t match what you’ve encountered? The first step is to stop comparing yourself with the images that shaped your idea of motherhood. Day-to-day life with a baby is already exhausting and exciting enough without adding more weight to your shoulders. Allow yourself to make mistakes! You can’t be a movie mom 24 hours a day, and you can’t do everything. It’s unrealistic to think that’s possible. Stopping negative thinking helps a lot, too. Thoughts like “I’m doing everything wrong” or “I can’t do anything” can paralyze you and anchor you in guilt and discomfort. Try to see all the positive in what you do, because it’s always much more than you tend to notice.