Your body is prepared to carry your baby, bring them into the world, and nourish them. Isn’t it wonderful to have this ability? After nine months of pregnancy, you’ll be eager to meet your baby, and childbirth will mark the end of that journey. We know you may have many questions and uncertainties about labor and postpartum. You may also not have many people around you to ask; in the following article, we share some things that no one talks about regarding childbirth and the first days with your baby. Let’s go!

Things nobody tells you about childbirth

The start of labor is a very exciting moment. After so many weeks of waiting, you’ll finally meet your baby. It’s an important moment you’ll always remember, so it helps to have as much information as possible to experience it with confidence and calm. After all, it’s a unique moment. Next, we share 8 things nobody tells you about childbirth:

Estimated due date

When you visit your midwife or gynecologist for the first time, they estimate your baby’s likely birth date based on the date of your last menstrual period. This is called EDD (Estimated Due Date) . According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists and the Society for Maternal-Fetal Medicine, full-term pregnancy is defined as lasting between 39 weeks, 0 days and 40 weeks and 6 days, which is typically when labor occurs. The EDD is therefore marked at week 40, but the truth is that it’s just as normal to give birth at week 37 as at week 42. Don’t worry if you’ve passed your EDD and your baby hasn’t been born yet; enjoy some rest and take a little time for yourself.

Birth and Delivery Plan

Many women don’t realize they can create your own birth plan. This is a document where you can express your wishes and preferences regarding your childbirth care. Ideally, you should prepare it between weeks 28 and 32 , so you can understand the process and resolve any questions before giving birth. What information does it include? Your preferences regarding your companion, birthing position, mobility, pain management, or interventions for both you and your baby, among others. The Ministry of Health offers the guide birth and delivery plan which clearly and simply explains everything you need to know about the stages of labor and what you can include in your birth plan. There are also organizations such as The birth is ours where you’ll find all the necessary information, such as this example of a birth plan so you can create yours from scratch, or use the it Downloadable template from LILLYDOO and fill it in.

Important: ask your midwife or your reference hospital any questions you have.

Contractions

Contractions are the starting gun. Without them, the uterus can’t change and dilate, which is essential to trigger labor. They begin thanks to high levels of oxytocin , the hormone responsible for initiating this process, but beforehand, during pregnancy, your body has already been practicing. You’ve probably noticed, or have noticed at some point during pregnancy, the so-called contractions. Braxton Hicks: your belly hardens for a few seconds and then returns to normal. They aren’t painful like labor contractions, but they serve as training for the uterus. Your midwife has likely already mentioned that labor contractions are different: more intense, longer-lasting, and rhythmic. When labor pains increase, the moment of delivery is closer, but it can take many hours to get there (especially if it’s your first delivery). Be patient—you have your whole life to enjoy your baby.

Births are not like in the movies

Have you noticed that, in movies, births often start with “my waters have broken”? Well, nothing could be further from the truth. The water breaking is neither as dramatic as it’s shown in movies, nor is it always so obvious. When your waters break, it’s true that labor usually begins in 90% of cases within the next 24 hours. If it doesn’t happen within this period, your care team may choose to stimulate the process, but it’s most common for it to start spontaneously. Ah! And even if your waters break, you don’t need to rush out. It doesn’t mean labor is imminent; as you’ve seen, many hours can pass. You should go to the hospital when contractions become more intense and regular—this indicates the moment is approaching, not the water breaking—or if the fluid is green, black, or red, since in that case it’s advisable to check that everything is fine. Also, what better place than your home to begin this process? A relaxed, calm environment supports labor, so dim the lights, listen to quiet music, walk around your house, and enjoy this moment with your partner. The hospital, on the other hand, can trigger stress.

Pain management

Not all women choose epidural anesthesia to manage labor pain. There are other alternatives to help you cope, such as creating a calm environment, walking and moving, or choosing the most comfortable positions during each contraction. Hospitals may also offer other non-pharmacological options during the different stages of labor, such as nitrous oxide. sterile water injections or a hot water bath It’s highly recommended that you visit your reference hospital during pregnancy to learn about the options they offer and to experience a birth where your wishes are respected.

The emotional part of childbirth

We’ve already mentioned that childbirth is a very important moment, and you’ll remember it for your entire life. It’s normal for emotions such as fear or insecurity to surface, so it’s important to manage these feelings during pregnancy. Sometimes our expectations about the type of delivery aren’t met , but being emotionally prepared—as well as having as much information as possible about the stages of labor, the type of support available, and pain management—is essential for a satisfying experience. In addition to childbirth preparation classes, mother-to-mother support groups often form, and they can be very helpful for sharing fears, expectations, or questions. It will be easy to find the closest one to you online, but your midwife can also help you find support groups.

Things you might not know about postpartum

Finally, the moment has arrived to hold your little adventurer in your arms. Feeling your baby on top of you and enjoying skin-to-skin contact is one of the most exciting moments you can experience. The nine months of pregnancy, during which you felt your baby inside, are now behind you, and after birth, it’s time to begin a fascinating stage full of joys and challenges Starting with those first days of adapting to your new life together and getting to know each other. Ready? The journey begins.

The lochia

Lochia are secretions expelled from the vagina after childbirth and will accompany you for the next four weeks. They consist of placental tissue, cervical mucus, and remnants from delivery, and are very similar to a period. Your midwife will assess with you during the first days whether the amount and appearance are normal.

The injustices

Many women notice very intense contractions during the first days after childbirth. No, labor hasn’t started again. These are afterpains—contractions that usually appear 48 hours after delivery and whose purpose is to return the uterus to its normal size. They typically last only three or four days but can extend up to a week.

Mixed feelings

People often talk about the instant infatuation that happens when a baby is born, and undoubtedly there’s no whirlwind of love quite like it—but it isn’t always rosy. Sometimes fatigue and the type of delivery can affect that very special first encounter, and you may feel like you just want to rest. Don’t blame yourself; it’s completely normal. There will be time to connect and enjoy the tenderness.

Visits to the newborn

One of the main reasons for disagreements between couples is managing visits to the newborn. Although when a baby is born, family and friends are eager to meet them, the truth is that visits don’t always suit the baby and the mother. Keep in mind that these first days are filled with intense emotions and fatigue, and it’s essential that both of you feel good and relaxed. You can rely on your partner to handle this part, freeing you from managing visits. It’s best if visits are short, in small groups, and within agreed-upon time slots—but even better if those who come to see you do so thoughtfully, with truly useful gifts (food in Tupperware and helping hands to run errands) and with plenty of respect for your decisions.

We hope this article helps you prepare for the adventure of your life. Trust yourself and your body, voice your needs, and validate your emotions.