Motherhood involves an impressive metamorphosis. Being a mother changes your body, your mind, your desires, and probably your priorities, too.

Did you imagine this revolution would be so huge? It’s likely that, no matter how much you pictured it or were told about it, reality has surpassed fiction. Your little one demands all your attention, and the time you used to have for yourself has disappeared. A lack of support, having family far away, or the very fast pace of life we lead can make things difficult for families. On top of that, many of us demand more of ourselves than we can realistically handle. That’s why it’s necessary to pause and find spaces and moments for self-care.

In the following article, we explain why it’s important to dedicate time to yourself and share some ideas to help you make that precious self-care happen.

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Caring is a very demanding task

Taking care of another person is a demanding and exhausting job. In addition to the insecurity that motherhood often brings—especially when your first child arrives—you also have to factor in the fatigue from sleepless nights, repetitive routines, and, in many cases, managing the other tasks that keep daily life running. Asking for help, sharing caregiving and household responsibilities, and setting aside time just for yourself to recharge are essential for coping better with caregiving. Have you noticed how little value caregiving has in our society? Making these difficulties visible and voicing your needs are the first steps toward raising social awareness of the enormous work caregiving entails. Let’s revolutionize care through self-care!

Five tips to achieve self-care

1. Think about what you need

Some examples?The possibilities are endless!

To figure out what you need, close your eyes and think about what would make you happy in that very moment—and what would help you disconnect so you can reconnect with your batteries recharged.

2. Sleep as much as you can

It’s true that, during pregnancy, everyone recommends sleeping as much as you can because a tiring period of poor-quality sleep will come later. They’re absolutely right. When a baby arrives, the whole family’s sleep is disrupted, and it isn’t always easy to find a solution. Daily responsibilities can consume you. The ideal? Take advantage of your little adventurer’s naps to give yourself a few minutes of rest. We understand it’s hard to do because there’s always something that needs doing: laundry, meal prep, shopping, folding clothes, and more. Try to push past that endless list of chores and focus on sleeping as much as you can. Everything else can wait; your rest cannot.

If you find it hard to ignore your to-do list, ask yourself which task is the highest priority and do it during one of your baby’s naps. Repeat the process every day. This way, you’ll keep checking things off the list while still getting the rest you need.

3. The importance of planning

Organization is essential when a baby arrives home. Using a planner can help you map out your daily activities and also assess which tasks are important and which are urgent. Amid all those responsibilities, you’ll need to make time for yourself. Impossible? No—really, it isn’t. Planning gives you more freedom to organize your time in a way that works for you. That said, it’s crucial to learn to say "no" when you don’t feel like doing something or when you simply can’t. We encourage you to practice this wonderful skill, because it’s also a form of self-care.

One piece of advice that can help is to create a short list of the things that make you feel good—for example, going for a walk, using your baby’s naps to rest, or reading a few pages of a book. Turn to this list when you feel like all you do is housework and care for your little one. It can be a gentle reminder to make time for yourself!

4. Always ask for help whenever you need it

Asking others for help can be very difficult. It’s a reality of our time. We think we can do everything, that we don’t need anyone, and that asking for help is a sign of weakness. It may even feel hard to ask because you worry you’re bothering others: how can you ask for help if no one asks you for help? It’s important to break these patterns that promote individualism and fuel the unrealistic demands we place on ourselves. There is nothing wrong with saying you can’t do it all anymore and that you need support. Delegating and voicing your needs should be a priority if you want to make self-care possible.

If you live with your partner, remember that this adventure belongs to both of you. Dividing chores fairly will not only help you find more time to rest, but it will also encourage a team mindset and strengthen your relationship.

5. Free yourself from guilt

Oh, the guilt mothers carry! For many women, taking time for themselves can bring an overwhelming sense of guilt. But taking time for yourself isn’t selfish—quite the opposite: to care for others, you must care for yourself. Understanding and accepting this is the first step toward making self-care a reality, not an unattainable goal. When you’re well, your baby will be well. Don’t forget!