Whether you’re still fully enjoying breastfeeding or already looking forward to having more freedom again soon, weaning will eventually be part of every breastfeeding mother’s and child’s journey. If you’re thinking about it, you may also be wondering about the best timing and the right method to gently end the breastfeeding period with your child. In this article, you’ll learn which circumstances influence weaning and how you can approach it.

When is the right time to wean?

Exclusive breastfeeding until the sixth month, followed by breastfeeding on demand in addition to complementary foods until the second year of life—this is the recommendation of the World Health Organization (WHO). By the age of two, most children are already eating enough that additional breast milk or infant formula is no longer necessary. For many mothers and their children, the start of weaning therefore coincides with the beginning of complementary feeding. Other mothers, on the other hand, continue to breastfeed their child beyond the second birthday or wean completely before that. Ultimately, the duration of the breastfeeding relationship is always a personal decision between mother and child, in which individual life circumstances also play a role.

There is no single right time to wean, but there are nonetheless signs that show the end of breastfeeding may have come for you and your child:

• Your child is showing increasing interest in solid foods or purees.

• They drink only briefly and less often.

• You have a desire for more freedom and self-determination over your body.

• Breastfeeding regularly causes you pain.

• Health conditions or the use of medication prevent you from continuing to breastfeed.

The following situations, on the other hand, are—contrary to popular belief— not a compelling reason to wean :

• Your child is getting teeth.

• You are getting your period again.

• You are pregnant again.

• You are taking medications that are compatible with breastfeeding.

• Your child is easily distracted while breastfeeding—this is completely normal when your child begins to explore their environment more and more between the fifth and sixth month.

• Your body produces less milk—there can be many different reasons for this, and weaning is not always necessary. It’s best to consult your midwife or your doctor.

No matter when the right moment for you to wean has come, whenever possible, choose a time when your baby feels comfortable. Teething, starting daycare, or other changes are exciting enough and aren’t necessarily the best conditions for such a big change in your little explorer’s life.

Weaning by you

Just as there is no perfect time to wean, there is also no standard program that works for every mother-and-child pair. However, if possible, it’s advisable to end breastfeeding gradually and without rushing . Many babies and toddlers find it difficult to wean from the breast, and a gentle transition (possibly over several months) makes it easier for them. What else you should pay attention to depends on the timing and circumstances.

Weaning before the fourth month of life

If you decide to end breastfeeding before the fourth month of life, the meals your little explorer has received so far through your breast will be replaced by a bottle, either in the form of infant formula or expressed breast milk. When switching from breast milk to infant formula, it’s advisable to first replace the feeding when you have the least milk in your breast—for most moms, this is in the afternoon or evening. This is gentler on your body, and your breasts can gradually reduce milk production. Your baby will probably accept only small amounts of formula from the bottle at first. Therefore, help them get used to it gradually and increase the amount of milk from the bottle step by step. You can read about what to consider when preparing infant formula in our article.

As long as your body is still producing milk, your baby will smell it and will probably want to continue breastfeeding whenever you’re nearby. This can make feeding times quite challenging. If bottle feeding doesn’t work at all, it may help if your partner or another caregiver gives your child the bottle at first. Also, putting your baby to bed or handling other situations that have previously been associated with breastfeeding can be taken over by your partner for the time being.

With the switch to a bottle, many things in your daily routine will surely change, but your child’s need for affection remains unchanged. During breastfeeding, physical contact with you was always part of the routine. Therefore, make sure these intense cuddling sessions aren’t neglected, even outside of breastfeeding—but that surely won’t be difficult for you. :)

Weaning at five months or older

Once your child is at least five months old at the beginning of weaning, you can gradually replace milk feedings with porridge—as recommended by the . Since your baby has only been introduced to breast milk so far, it may take some time for them to accept the new food and for their body to get used to it. The amount of porridge they actually consume will still be very small at the beginning, and breast milk will remain their main source of nutrients and energy for several months unless you replace it with infant formula. Therefore, start by feeding your child a few spoonfuls of porridge before breastfeeding. You can then gradually shorten the breastfeeding duration while increasing the amount of porridge. When your child is ready for complementary foods is quite individual. Most children are ready between the fifth and seventh month. You can read about the signs that indicate the right time and how to make the gradual transition to porridge in the article “ “.

For the transition, it can be helpful to change your usual Still position to a less cozy one—for example, from lying down to sitting. This way, your child not only notices that something has changed, but also learns that affection and physical contact are not dependent on breastfeeding. You can also calmly communicate to your little explorer that you will gradually be offering the breast less often, explain why, and reassure them that you will still be there for them just as before. Depending on your child’s age, you can even agree together on how to shape the end of breastfeeding. Perhaps it helps to temporarily agree on fixed times when your child can nurse at the breast, for example in the evening before going to sleep.

During gradual weaning as part of introducing solid foods, your body adjusts to the decreased demand and produces less milk over time. The milk glands themselves also gradually regress, but they remain functional for at least a month after weaning and can even still contain milk for months or years afterward. If excess milk in your breast causes you pain in the meantime, you can express or pump out milk . Try to remove only as much milk as necessary until the pressure decreases, so you don’t stimulate milk production further.

Night weaning

In the first months of life, you fed your baby around the clock whenever they were hungry. From the 9th to the 12th month, this is no longer necessary; your little explorer’s digestion has developed enough that they no longer need additional nourishment at night. Many toddlers still drink the most at night, before going to sleep or after waking up at the breast, even when they are already eating solid foods during the day. The reason for this is usually not hunger, but your child’s need for security : The familiar and cherished breastfeeding ritual calms them, provides security, and helps them fall asleep. We have gathered some tips and tricks to gently approach the end of nighttime breastfeeding for you and your child:

• Soothe your child at night first, but without letting them fall asleep. Instead, cuddle with them and calm them through physical contact.

• In the next step, soothe your child at night with words or by picking them up, but not through breastfeeding. Even if it’s difficult, stay consistent: after two to three nights, they may already have gotten used to the new routine. If they cannot be soothed without breastfeeding, your partner can also take over the nightly comforting, as your child has so far associated you with breastfeeding.

• If both of you are emotionally ready, you can try having your child sleep in their own bed or room. Sometimes it helps if your child doesn’t smell the milk or if it’s not constantly available.

• Many children also want their non-nutritive sucking need to continue to be satisfied (often before falling asleep), because sucking on the breast calms them. If your child shows a strong sucking need in the evening, you might consider giving them a pacifier to fall asleep. However, this should be used sparingly so that your little one doesn’t suck on it all day, but limits its use to falling asleep. Your pediatrician can also answer any questions you have about using a pacifier at any time.

In the video, LILLYDOO sleep coach Julia explains how to gently wean your little explorer from sleep feeding.

However, keep in mind that the end of breastfeeding does not necessarily mean that your child will sleep through the night from now on. It’s quite possible that your little explorer will still wake up at night and may need your help to fall back asleep.

Weaning by your child

The end of breastfeeding doesn’t necessarily have to come from you. Your child may naturally show less and less interest in the breast, gradually drinking for shorter periods and less frequently, and thus wean themselves . For some children, this happens as early as around twelve months, while for others, this natural weaning process begins later. Most children wean themselves between the second and fourth year of life. You will probably notice when your child’s interest in your breast gradually diminishes. If your child is also eating with a good appetite, they may simply be slowly wanting something other than breast milk—a completely natural developmental step and no reason to worry. Then you can stop actively offering the breast and instead only breastfeed when they ask for it.

However, in newborns and younger infants, there may be other reasons behind it if they suddenly no longer want to drink. For example, it could be that you get your period for the first time after birth, and the milk tastes different because of it. A new scent or a new body lotion can also initially confuse your baby and lead to more cautious drinking at first. Additionally, health reasons such as a blocked nose, a , oral thrush, or stress can be the cause of reduced intake for a period of time. In such cases, it can help to temporarily feed your child expressed milk from a bottle. If that doesn’t work, or if you feel that your infant is regularly taking in too little milk, you can consult your pediatrician or a breastfeeding counselor.

No matter when weaning begins for you, and whether it originates from you, your child, or both of you, it is a process that doesn’t always move forward in a straight line. On average, weaning takes three months, but the duration is very individual and varies from mother-baby pair to mother-baby pair. External circumstances also have an influence: for example, if your child temporarily has a greater need to breastfeed during illness, teething, or the stranger anxiety phase, this is nothing unusual.

Weaning due to external circumstances

Gentle, gradual weaning is recommended, but it is not always possible: illness, medication, or other circumstances may require stopping breastfeeding within a few days or even abruptly. Even if you are able to provide your child with formula in such a situation, the sudden end of breastfeeding can sometimes pose particular challenges: breastfeeding is not only about nutrition but also about physical closeness and affection. Give your child and yourself plenty of love and support, especially in the case of an abrupt stop—through attention and intensive cuddle sessions .

In addition to changing your routine, abrupt weaning can also bring physical complaints with it. Since your body does not stop milk production overnight, it can lead to breast infections and milk stasis. As a result of milk stasis, a so-called milk fever with flu-like symptoms such as fever and chills can also occur. But no need to worry: milk fever is harmless and usually resolves within three to four days.

Tips for weaning

• Drink sage or peppermint tea Both are traditionally recommended to inhibit milk production.

• Cool your chest with compresses or quark wraps. This reduces blood circulation and can help prevent breast inflammation.

• Massage your chest every now and then to help prevent a blocked milk duct. If the pressure becomes too high, gently massage or pump out some milk—but only enough to relieve the uncomfortable tension, as otherwise milk production will be stimulated.

For all questions about breastfeeding and weaning, you can contact your midwife or a breastfeeding counselor at any time. Consultation with a midwife is usually covered by your health insurance, but you typically have to pay for breastfeeding counseling privately.

Whether you decide early on not to breastfeed anymore or allow your child to nurse at your breast for as long as they want, the most important tip for weaning is this: trust your gut feeling and don’t feel obligated to anything. Only you and your child decide when and how your breastfeeding relationship ends. Whatever approach you choose, we wish you all the best on your personal journey!