"A child makes your happiness perfect," "As soon as you look at your baby after birth, all pain is forgotten," "Your favorite’s smile is worth all the hardships"... This ideal image of the happily glowing new mother is often conveyed to women before birth—because how could you not be swept up in a wave of happiness when you see that adorable little being? But often, shortly after birth, the exact opposite is true: 8 out of 10 mothers experience baby blues, and it often hits them unexpectedly. But don’t worry—just as quickly as the sudden mood drop comes, it usually fades again.

In this article, we’ll explain which symptoms can be associated with the baby blues, what causes them, and what you can do about them. You’ll also learn how they differ from a , as the two terms are often mistakenly used interchangeably.

Symptoms

The baby blues typically occur within the first three to five days after birth and last between one day and one week . Usually, the symptoms disappear on their own after a few days—sometimes even after just a few hours. Since the baby blues often show up as increased crying, they’re also referred to as the so-called "crying days." In addition, the following symptoms may occur:

• Despondency

• Emotional sensitivity

• Mood swings

• Irritability and aggression that may feel unfamiliar to you

• Anxiety

• Concerns about your baby and the future

• Concentration problems

• Mild sleep disturbances

• Loss of appetite

Causes

Experiencing baby blues has nothing to do with not loving your newborn, being ungrateful, or being a bad mother—it has a very simple physical cause. The reason is the sharp hormone drop after birth, which can briefly send your mood plummeting. Baby blues are therefore not a mental disorder, but part of your body’s normal adjustment process. During pregnancy, estrogen and progesterone levels are very high. These two hormones are responsible, for example, for placenta growth as well as the development of the uterine lining. They also prepare your body for milk production. At the same time, they affect your mood: estrogen stabilizes it, while progesterone has a relaxing, anxiety-reducing effect. If the levels of these two hormones drop rapidly after childbirth, you may feel sad and low—until your hormone levels stabilize again after a few days.

Uncertainty in your new role as a mom can further intensify the symptoms. You’re probably exhausted because your baby needs you every two hours, everything is unfamiliar, and you haven’t yet found a routine with your little one. You may also feel unsettled in your body due to lochia and not feel quite comfortable with your now softer belly, or you may worry about whether you’ll live up to your new role as a mother. Crying helps your body process all of this and reduce tension . For some mothers, it’s only after the exhaustion that follows that they’re able to let go and sleep for a few hours.

Countermeasure

Since the baby blues are not an illness, medical treatment isn’t necessary. Usually, the symptoms improve on their own after a few days. Still, a few things can help you get through the baby blues phase:

• Adequate rest and sleep The saying "Tomorrow everything will look completely different again" has proven true in many life situations. LILLYDOO Midwife Sissi Accordingly, feeling well-rested and alert can also be a helpful preventive measure.

• Self-acceptance : Many women feel guilty that they aren’t overjoyed now that the baby is here. They wonder why they don’t immediately feel that strong emotional bond with their child that people often talk about. Try to accept your current state as completely normal, and don’t talk yourself into feelings of guilt. Once your hormone levels have stabilized, you’ll start feeling better—and as you and your little explorer get to know each other, that close bond will develop naturally.

• Confide in someone : You don’t have to go through this time alone. Share your feelings with someone close to you, whether it’s your partner, your mother, or a friend. Your midwife is also a great point of contact; as an expert, she supports women every day who are facing similar challenges.

• Understanding from the outside : The last thing you need right now is blame or misunderstanding from those around you. A comforting word and a hug can work small miracles and show you that you don’t have to pretend.

• External support : In a phase when everything temporarily feels overwhelming, it can be incredibly valuable if your partner takes over the housework, grandparents bring over a cooked meal, or your best friend runs the errands. Don’t hesitate to ask for help. Outsiders often underestimate how much relief these small favors can provide.

• Close contact with your baby : Use this postpartum period to spend plenty of time with your child. Skin-to-skin contact is especially important for early bonding between you and your little one. So feel free to add an extra cuddle session—especially if you are not breastfeeding.

If your symptoms don’t subside on their own, it could be a . Unlike the baby blues, this is a serious illness that, in severe cases, can even lead to thoughts of suicide or infanticide (killing of one’s own child). Therefore, be sure to consult a doctor if you notice that your low mood lasts longer than a week.

By the way: Some men also experience baby blues. The causes are not yet fully understood, but current research suggests that hormones play a rather minor role. Sleep deprivation, stress, feeling overwhelmed, and difficulties adjusting to the new situation seem to be more significant factors. The symptoms are similar: a diffuse sadness, sleep disturbances, irritability, and anxiety about not being able to meet expectations. Dads should also consult a doctor if the baby blues persist.

We hope the "crying days" pass quickly and that you can look forward to the exciting future with your little explorer again!

PS: As a new mom, there are certainly other topics that concern you and changes that may surprise you. That’s why we want to accompany you during this exciting time with our and support you with helpful information and expert tips that arrive in your inbox exactly when they’re relevant to you.