Once your own children have left the nest, you can finally enjoy a good dose of freedom: spontaneous trips, not having to be home at a set time, visiting loved ones – all of this is now possible. At the same time, you may notice that you miss your children and a bit of the hustle and bustle at home. The joy is even greater when you hear the news: “You’re going to be grandparents!” An exciting and thrilling time begins. To help you fully embrace your role as a grandparent and be a wonderful support to your family while still preserving your freedom, five-time grandfather Jürgen Busch from the blog has put together some tips for your new role as grandma or grandpa.

1. When grandparents promote family cohesion

With the birth of your grandchild, the family grows by one more little member. In your role as grandmother or grandfather, you are an important point of reference for your granddaughter or grandson, so make sure you spend plenty of time together. Unless you are lucky enough to live together in a multi-generational home, there is – unlike with your own children when they were small – always a certain physical distance. To stay informed about each other's daily lives and stick together as a family, it makes sense to plan regular joint activities . A family appointment calendar is especially useful for this. This way, everyone can see who has time when, and it becomes very easy to arrange visits or plan Excursions . A Family vacation once or twice a year also promotes family cohesion. It is important that you, as a Grandma or Grandpa , are an active part of family life and avoid situations where anyone feels like a guest in someone else’s home.

2. Portion advice well

As so often in life, the same applies to grandparents: too much is unhealthy! It’s better to step into the Observer role and avoid interfering in every situation as long as there is no danger – and yes, that can require a lot of calm and patience. Feel free to remind yourself again and again: no one is perfect from the start, whether in motherhood, in the Father role , or in the grandparent role. Don’t criticize your child if, for example, they take a different approach to parenting than you are used to. Instead, offer advice when you are asked. Unsolicited know-it-all attitudes can push many people away. Avoid saying, "You must ...," and instead share your experiences — the conclusions are then left to the parents.

3. Talk about education

Parenting today can no longer be compared to parenting in the past. Talk with your children and grandchildren about upbringing, and find out what is desired and what is not welcome. Many grandchildren enjoy the fact that grandparents often turn a blind eye and, for example, offer tasty treats here and there, but this is sometimes not appreciated by the parents – surely you will find a healthy middle ground between spoiling and being consistent. It can help to remember your own childhood and honestly ask yourself: what was perhaps less good in your own upbringing and in the way you were treated by your parents and grandparents, and can it now be done differently with your grandchildren? Even if some parenting methods may seem unfamiliar to you at first – give them a chance and trust your child to want only the best for your granddaughter or grandson.

4. Get involved yourself

Was grandpa, in his own paternal role, only the provider in the family? Then it’s high time to lend a hand! It’s never too late to learn everything about the ins and outs of caring for your grandchild. Of course, this becomes somewhat easier the closer you live to your children. This way, grandpa (also in cooperation with grandma) can give the young parents some breathing room, so they can enjoy time for themselves despite parenthood – and your support will certainly be especially appreciated. For many parents, it is not easy at first to leave the child with the grandparents. Show your child that they can trust you and that you enjoy spending time with your grandchild. After all, your grandchild also appreciates being close to you, which strengthens your bond. There is no set time for when your grandchild is allowed to stay with you. Work together with the parents to see how the little explorer feels and what amount of time is right for them—and for you as well.

5. Don't forget your own happiness

As much as you cherish the time with your Grandchild and enjoy it, you should not sacrifice all your free time or put your own interests aside – after all, you have earned the freedom you have gained. Because once the children are older, they will not feel comfortable if they are always the reason why grandma and grandpa cannot do this or that. A healthy balance between new responsibilities and your previous freedom is important. You definitely have the right to say: "That’s fun for me now!"

6. Using new media

Not only has parenting style changed a lot, but so has the Dealing with technology . Stay up to date with digital media – this way, you can participate much more actively in the lives of your children and grandchildren. A Video call here and small WhatsApp messages there can shorten the time until the next meeting and keep you updated on your grandchildren’s development. They will probably be happy to show you how the applications work. Maybe you also feel like taking a course that explains digital media specifically for older people. You can find such offers, for example, at the adult education center.

7. Support the grandchildren financially

Even with a modest pension, it is possible to provide for your grandchildren’s future. A savings account with only five euros per month paid in adds up to over 1,000 euros after 18 years, not including any interest earned. If you invest the money wisely and it accrues interest accordingly, the amount increases even more. It’s a nice contribution toward a driver’s license or a small financial boost for a first apartment! And it doesn’t always have to be big money gifts for birthdays or other occasions. Many grandchildren – and the parents, too – enjoy spending time together and going on nice outings. Ideas for what you can give your granddaughter or grandson can be found in the article „ The first birthday ".

Just as you previously adapted to the role of mother or father, you will also grow into the role of grandma or grandpa. Communicate openly with the parents about any uncertainties or questions, so you can find solutions together. The most important thing is that you enjoy the time with your grandchild and experience many adventures together!

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